Your Pet Loss Stories

'Rosie Buttons - God Lent Us His Angel for a Short While xx'

by Karen Wernham
(Warrington, Cheshire, UK)

Rosie Buttons would have wanted us to share this with you all. I am writing this while my emotions are raw, we only lost Rosie Buttons two days ago. So many tears I am crying while posting this.

Just over two years ago, we were on a transport run for a local rescue, we had just got back when a phonecall came through, "can you go back and take a male collie to the vets?" After a lot of huffing and puffing we said yes and we set off for the journey back and to...

We got to the kennels and they said oh we will go and get Buttons for you... I turned round to say hiya to him and was knocked off my feet... Their was this stunning mainly black collie with white paws and chest..

Well needless to say, we found out he was a she, and I had always wanted a girl collie. We didnt like the name buttons so we called her Rosie Buttons. By the time we got to the vets, we decided she was our girl... and we took her home to meet the other collies.

Within a month Rosie Buttons had started to have Epileptic Fits but they were regulated and she became stable, she had lumps on her body, vet thought she had been injected by her last owner who was a drug user. Later on that year one popped and it was a devil to heal.

Rosie Buttons became so confident, fitted in well, everyone loved her and during her brief two years with us raised 7,000 for UK rescues, she loved her dog shows and her best friend was Badger Buttons. She had the most fantastic temperament for a collie, wherever she went people would fuss her and she loved it.

If we were on a transport run, she would go with hubby as she had a calming effect on other dogs, as tho to say look your safe now.

2 months ago, I noticed when grooming her she was like red hot underneath. I sat her down and said roll over Rosie and within a few days a lump the size of an apple had appeared on her teats.. We took her to the vets and she went on medication and they drained her and this straw coloured fluid came out and then later on it was like a black coloured blood. She was put on very strong tablets.

The vet decided a mastitis strip would be needed so 10 days ago she went for the operation and a biopsy was sent off. We had to wait a week for that...First few days of op after she was in pain so we got metacam for her and she was ok and was picking up and being Rosie Buttons herself.

Sadly on Friday the results came back, it was an aggresive form of breast cancer. We were devastated as we were told we had only weeks left with her.. We had planned lots of things to do with her, say goodbye to people. We have been inundated with hundreds of messages from all over the UK.

On Sunday early am, I was working from home and noticed she was staring at us and she couldn't lie down or roll over.. her breathing was huffing and puffing so I gave her some of her metacam. She seemed to settle a bit for a while and was restless again. She was red hot underneath but it wasn't her op scar and we noticed another lump had appeared there.

I got Rosie ready with her posh new lead and I warned Gary my husband that this could be the start of the end a lot sooner. We got to the vets and our vet was great, same vet who was treating her and he said she's very poorly, her belly had filled up with fluid again, and her breathing wasn't right, it was her time to return back to being an angel. They all loved Rosie Buttons, she was the perfect patient, would do anything for anyone. She was good at her commands.

She went to sleep with her mum and dad at her side and she could hear our collies barking in the car. She went very quickly, bless her she must have been so tired. Within seconds the relief on her face was the old Rosie Buttons we knew before she became poorly. We left the vets happy she was out of pain.

We got home about 3am in the morning, had a cup of tea and we were both ok, that she had gone to Rainbow Bridge. We sat up all night just chatting and I in fact went back to work at 4am and I was fine until BANG... ten to 8, I cracked up, tears streaming down my face, crying wailing, deep wailing, wanted her back. Should we go to vets and get her back now.

Then Anger set in, was their a God? How could he be so rotten doing that to a dog who was doing so good after a horrendous start.. I never cried over relatives this much and how many tears can a human cry?

I have a fantastic support ring and my best friend Leslie is fantastic. All sorts has gone through my mind, is there anything more we could have done? Did I miss something earlier on? I wanted to be with her to see she was ok? Did we do the right thing letting her go?

All sorts of emotions are flying around at the moment, we see a tuft of her, I see a tuft of her fur, I start crying. I see her medications and her ham in the fridge which we gave with her tablets, I start crying, her dog toys lying around, again I start to blubber up..

I keep saying come back to us Rosie Buttons let us know you're ok. We want you back, even though we know she has gone, we have accepted that and that it was her time, it's not making it easier..

I'm hardly eating or drinking and finding it very hard to cope as is my husband as Rosie Buttons was his Princess. We have six other dogs in the house and it feels so quiet... its like they're waiting for Rosie to come back from the vets. They loved her so much and a couple are fretting.

We have taken them out for a long walk and I burst into tears as I shouted Rosie come back and then realised it was Millie our other black dog... but we have to be strong for them, they need us to be there for them now..

Marmite the kitten who is 14 weeks old misses her big sister who she curled up with... Rosie was Maddoch the puppies play mate... Pudsey would always sit with Rosie when she had a fit and comfort her and they would run off together when she come round. Badger Buttons was Rosies soul mate, they were training partners and show partners, best friends... and he is really fretting for his Girlie Friend.

Time is a great healer and we know we will get through this and our heartache will return to memories that were fantastic. She was with us 2 years, 1 month 1 week, 1 day, 7 hours. and in that short time she touched so many hearts of animals throughout the UK, let alone ours.

I was speaking to one rescue and she put this...

'Karen honey - it will be one of the hardest times of your life. You have to accept it. You will get through it and she will be forever in your heart. She was put here on earth for a short while to touch the many people she has. Her job is done, she will be safe. Please don't despair, God needs his angel back - she was too precious to him.'

This is what is keeping us going at the moment..

Even tho Rosie Buttons isn't here no more in body, she is still helping rescues, all her collars and leads and medication is going to rescues to help other animals. Rosie has her own blogspot where you can see her journey.

We do the Rosie Buttons Christmas Hamper Appeal every year and this year we are still doing it but on a smaller scale.

WE LOVE YOU ROSIE BUTTONS AND HOPE YOU'RE SAFE AND HAVING FUN AT RAINBOW BRIDGE, YOU WERE A DOG IN A MILLION.

YOUR HEARTBROKEN MUM AND DAD, CAFFERY, PUDSEY, LOTTIE, MILLIE, MADDOCH, BADGER, FEZZI THE RABBIT, MARMITE AND SAM AND DEVIL CAT THE CATS AND THE FISH AND TOMSK THE HAMSTER. XXXXXXXXXXX