Your Pet Loss Diaries

'Jacquilyn & Minti'

About Minti

Minti my two year old black and white Norwegian Forest cat.

When did you lose Minti?

Two days ago.

At which stage of pet loss grief do you feel you are currently at?

Or how are you feeling right now?

Initial stage - feeling dead myself.

Jacquilyn and Minti's Story so far

I have a beautiful cat called Kali. He made friends very easily with the neighbourhood cats so I thought I would get him a live in friend.

I would lie in bed and thank of what I would call Kali's friend. I decided on Minti. I used to daydream on what she would be like. She had to be a she as Kali is male.

Kali is a black cat and I thought I would get a white cat because at night I can't see Kali.

I went to see the kittens at Cats Protection - mainly to see the white kitten they had. There was another kitten though who was making a lot of noise. She obviously wanted some attention. I asked if the little one with the blob on her nose could be taken out of the cage and sure enough she was. She ran around, so happy and carefree. She came home with me and she was called Minti.

Minti was the light of my life, I smiled every time I saw her. She made me laugh. She created games to play with Kali - like 'pat fight' where they would sort of box without claws through the wire fence in the garden. She would ambush Kali and chase him and then they would reverse. She was always up to something.

At night she would groom Kali - lick his face and neck. He would put his front leg on Minti to keep her at it.

Minti was killed six days ago. Kali and I have lost our light and joy.

Kali knows Minti is dead as he saw her body. He now follows me from room to room. I think he is frightened.

There is a huge empty space in world where Minti used to be. She is irreplaceable.

I am shocked and my brain is befuddled - I have tears in my eyes. I cannot bear the thought that my Minti is dead. I cannot speak without crying.

Yesterday, before she was taken to the vets for cremation, I sat in my chair by the window and stroked and kissed her. It was a grey day, but the sun came out and shone on her face. She was a gift from God and I had lost her. I wrapped her in her favourite blanket and put her bed toys in her paws. I wanted her to go to Heaven with her favourites - so that she wouldn't be cold or have nothing to play with.

It was so hard handing over her beautiful body to the vet - I wanted to keep her so that I could stroke and kiss her every day. But I knew that wasn't possible. So I handed my Minti to the nurse and she is now really gone.

She was just 27 months old and I had had her for 25 of those months.

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