Four years ago I too had to put my Beethovan to sleep for the same reason. He was a 9 year old Shih Tzu. He also had a tumor blocking his wind pipe, they could only remove part of it and sent him home with predisone. It gave him six extra weeks, but then he started to become bloated and urinating more then usual. I promised him in the vet's office the 1st time I would not let him suffer again like that with his breathing. When I noticed his breathing starting to change I made the decision to put him asleep.
The night before I made his favorite dinner of spaghetti, which he ate at his own place at the table - he was a very spoiled, loved furry baby, he of course had sauce all over his face. The next day we went walking all around his favorite spots.
I loved him more than anything and everyday I still think of him.
At first I too wondered and anguished over if I had done the right thing. As time has passed I have come to stop blaming myself and realize that I was so lucky to have had those last six weeks with him when it was like he was happy and healthy, but I remembered my promise and let him go to other loving hands even though it was the hardest thing I have ever done.
I am starting to tear up as I write this because I still miss him so much. I cannot offer you words to ease your pain as only time will do that, but I wanted you to know that someone does understand your pain. I can only believe that I made the right decision and that he knows I did what was best because I loved him so much I wanted him to die in peace and not pain.
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