by Rhonda Gamberg
(Abbotsford, BC, Canada)
I shared my story with you shortly after my baby fell asleep. My grief was so acute and overwhelming. I too am surrounded my people who do not understand what it means to lose a beloved furry friend.
Domino Dax, or just plain Daxi, has been gone now for nearly 8 months. There are times when I talk about him, I still cry. I find that journalling about him helps me. I know he is happy, whole and pain free at Rainbow Bridge and that I will one day be reunited with him, never to be parted again. I have a picture of him I keep my bedside which also reads, "Forever in my heart and memories."
Grief is such a personal thing, we all go through the same pain, heartache and yet it's different for every one. On the 30th of each month I light a candle in his memory.
I called the lady from the pet shelter where I adopted Daxi from. She was sad to hear of it, but then asked me if and when I was ready would I open my heart to love another. I have but she did not come from the pet shelter, instead from a friend who didn't want her anymore. I have named her Tia Maria. She is a tortoise shell but you can see the tabby in her so I call her a tortoise shabby!
It wasn't till about a couple of months ago that I could open my heart to her completely, feeling like I was betraying Daxi until I read a story called, "Requiem for Maxine." After I read it I just wept and then said in my heart, "okay" I will love her completely for you Daxi as a tribute to you. He has meant so much to me, I didn't realize just how much I leaned on his feline strength, it was truly an honor to be his Mom. He will always be with me in spirit.
Shortly after he left, my grief so raw, I asked God to let me see him one more time, to let me know he was okay, and He did but not until much later. The dream - my son and I were living in a mobile home, the sun was shining and Daxi was on the front porch waiting to be let in. However, there was another cat there as well. When I opened the door to let them in, I said to the other cat, "Daxi comes in first." When relating this dream to a friend, she said "You know what that means to me, it means that Daxi will always come first in your heart."
I thank God for that dream, it showed me indeed that Daxi is okay, he is at peace and rest.
Daxi's Mom