Your Pet Loss Diaries

May 17, 2012

by Sun
(Texas)

Dear Charlie,

Months keep going by me without you, too many months and days, but I still look for a glimpse of you every day. Even though I know you’ve never really left me, I constantly gaze at the driveway that you showed up to be in the family nine years ago. I didn’t realize it then, but you were, are and always will be, my Guardian Angel. You then showed Bud and Duke how to be Angels like you, and they are doing the most marvelous job, for otherwise I would have never survived earth life’s endless crisis. You are my true savior.

While you were not here, Bud took over your role so well, then you and Leya guided him to the Bridge on that saddest Monday. My golden boy, nothing has been the same since your journey to the Bridge, but up there, you found Leya and introduced us to Leya’s Mom, just for us. You know how much Diana helped us in every way possible, and our deepest thanks and love go to Leya’s beautiful heart. Now, you two are looking after Bud so well and I know three of you are always watching over us, ever so faithful children, we miss you even in our dreams.

My beautiful child, Bud, I still cannot believe that you really have gone to the Bridge. There will never be another child like you, never, ever. I still cannot talk about you or Charlie to anyone else, except Diana, because no one understands our bond and love. I am just so grateful for being a mom to the most wonderful children in the world. Your bodies are not here, but I will always be your mom, miss you so much, then one day you certainly will greet me at the Bridge with your beautiful smile.

I could have never gotten through those most difficult times without you and I so thank you for your unconditional love, which Duke is feeling too. Duke is acting just like you, Bud—so brave! I am so proud of all of you, but my tears won’t stop, because I don’t see you any more and I don’t have my big happy family by me. My sorrow is so great, despite the most loving memories of you, because I so miss sharing our greatest love. I know, one day, you will lead me out of these darkest days, as you have always done.

Thank you for being in my life, you will always be my whole world. Please come visit me tonight.

Love you forever, Mom