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Your Pet Loss Diaries

'Naya & Jean'

One Month Since Naya's Passing

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I know what you are going through
by: Racheal

Hi,

Like you I cry every day, sometime, twice or three times, constantly questioning myself. Did I do enough? Did I hurt my Khanli when cleaning his ears?

So many things go through your mind at a time like this. I know I have a long way to go, but reading your feelings helps knowing you are not alone.

I loved my Khanli, and if I thought that if I took his place to make him better I would have gladly done that. My love for him is so, so deep and like you, I have never cried so much for humans as I did for my babies, more for Khanli as he was so special to me.

Many of us that grieve for our babies, can teach other humans the impact of the unconditional love, compassion and joy a furry friend can bring in our lives, also the humility we all need from time to time.

Thank you
Try to give it time
by: Sam

Dear Andrea

I'm really sorry for your loss but I had to write because I don't think you should be making any major decisions at this time.

Getting one of your other dogs put to sleep could be, and probably would be a mistake. It's hard to think clearly when you are in grief and I wouldn't want you to rush into anything until you can think clearly and have given yourself time to get over the initial shock of what has happened.

I think you will forgive your dogs in time but it will take time, so try not to make decisions based on what you are feeling now. I'm not an expert but I know enough to know that your emotions will be all over the place, and what seems like the right thing or only thing to do now will seem very different later on.

Even if there were clear reasons to lose one of your other dogs I would still say wait. Wait and see how you feel when the initial shock and pain have passed.

I hope this hasn't reached you too late and I would encourage you to post your story on this site so that other Visitors who may not see this page can more easily offer you comfort.

Sam
I know how you feel
by: Anonymous

Dear Jean,

Thank you for sharing your story. I am going through the same thing as you - it happened 2 days ago. Three of my dogs attacked, mauled and killed my oldest and gentlest one Finnegan. I was in the shower when it happened. I had put them out in the yard to enjoy the sunshine. These 4 were always together. When I opened the door to let them in I saw Finn on the deck. He was unconscious but still alive, but I knew from the wounds that I couldn't save him. He died a few minutes later.
You hit on exactly what I am going through. The grief of losing Finn is almost unbearable, but knowing that my other dogs did it is just unfathomable. I can't look at them, I can't touch them, I am just numb to them. I feel like I have lost all my dogs.
I don't know what to do. I made an appointment just then to have one of the 3 put to sleep. It's not that I think she was most to blame, it's just that I can't stand to see the 3 of them together. It's like the 3 of them represents Finn's horrific death and if I break the threesome maybe I will be able to have a relationship with the other 2 some day.
None of my friends or family understands how I feel. In your experience, can you feel love again for the ones who killed? How long does it take?
I am truly lost.

Andrea
Deepest sympathy
by: Joe

Jean,

I'm so sorry for your loss and how hard your recovery is going for you. I'm still mourning the loss of my beloved Sugarfoot, and I know the hurt that he's gone runs as deep as anything I've ever experienced. Life will never be the same without him. It just can't be. But I hold onto knowing that one day things will be better.

One day the shock of what happened to your precious Naya will change. Maybe it won't just "feel better." Maybe it'll begin as anger. But one day whenever that change does come, you can know that you're one step closer to feeling truly better. I wish I could tell you something to ease your pain, to make things just a little better for you, to offer you something more than my deepest sympathy, but all I can say is this: please try to think of the good times you had with her; please hang in there; please let time get you through this.

Joe


"Naya & Jean"
by: MARY

Dear Jean,
I am so sorry for your loss...it's been almost three months since I lost my beloved Great Dane Barabbas.

I still burst into tears just out of the blue. Some think there is something wrong with me to not have snapped out of it by now but I don't care what anyone thinks and neither should you.

I too have lost many humans and it has not affected me like the loss of this precious creature that I was blessed to have loved for almost 12 years.

This year we have erected a Christmas tree in his honour to celebrate his life. This has helped me a lot...of course it gives people one more thing to talk about but like I said I don't care.

What we are feeling is very normal. I don't think we will ever really recover from this loss we share but perhaps in time we will both learn to live with the pain......

I feel very sorry for those who have not known and had what we have been blessed to share with our beloved Barabbas and Naya...We are the lucky ones.
So Sorry
by: tricia

Jean,
I feel your pain in every word. I am having a really hard time adjusting to the loss of my pet Rex 11-18-08. I have no problems understanding death and acceptance of death, I don't know how to cope with missing him.

No manual for that just a hour by hour thing that is killing me emotionally. Wishing we could just smile when we think of our pets but we long and grieve to see them.

Hoping you are feeling better soon. Hang in there :)

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One Month Since Naya's Passing .