Your Pet Loss Diaries

Jan 25, 2011

by Jenny Pastrano
(San Antonio, TX)

Yesterday was a good day. My Mom played hookie and so did my boyfriend and we all went to Castroville to get away. We went to visit all the little landmarks including a cross on top of a hill... we went on a few hiking trails and it was nice to get some energy out. We wrote Nikkie's name on a few rocks and threw them in a creek and made wishes... I wished that she knew I loved her and hoped she was ok.

We came home and I worked on the scrapbook a little more... but then things went back to crying and disbelief... my boyfriend told me how awful it was to find her and that he can't stand to let the other dogs out because they sniff the spot he found her at... he was so angry because he said they also pee right on the spot and he feels it's a slap in the face to what happened... I guess I didn't realize how hard he is taking it....

We both decided to call in to work today... I think I was ready to go back but he wasn't... he wants to be able to go outside and not think of the horrible thing that happened there... so we talked it out and we're going to build a fire pit in the backyard so it can be a place where we gather and make good memories on the same place Nikki took her last breath.

Sometimes I wish I hadn't seen her afterwards because that's the image that haunts me...