Your Pet Loss Diaries

Dec 12, 2013

by Gabrielle
(Scotland)

Last night Alfie was on my bed, for the last time. We telephoned the vet regarding his breathing which was laboured. He said the steroids were wearing off and he needed a second dose.

He drank copiously this morning but did not eat and we decided that he needed relief and permanent rest. We decided to take him to the local vet which is only a 10 minute drive.

My hear is broken. I held him in my arms after the event. He was still warm and I closed his eyes and he looked peaceful and sleeping normally. I needed to do this to try to erase the painful sight of his distress.

I was quite angry as the vet said not only had he the mouth growth but also a large growth in his abdomen, so whatever we did would not help. All the homeopathy and herbal remedies could not cope.

A warning for the future, vets are not very good. Had there been a holistic vet in the area, that would have been my choice. I may be raging because I am so unhappy, but if you have insurance perhaps the vets sell you treatment that is useless. I hope I can get over the bitterness.

Why did my darling Alfie never show any sign of this terrible disease before now. He was very very active for his 8+ years and was catching mice and voles until 2 weeks before the end.

I feel sick whenever I think of what he has endured. As I type this I miss him terribly as usually when he hears the keys click he is in here and up on the keyboard. I've discovered more about how the computer works by him accidentally hitting the keys than I ever learned from the book.

Wonderful friend, I so loved him - and I can't even cry, my grief is beyond that.