Your Pet Loss Diaries

Jan 2, 2013

by Gabrielle
(Scotland)

The New Year is weighing heavily on me. I miss you so much. When the cat flap rattles in the night and wakens me I expect you to be on the bed nagging to be dried off.

When will I get used to the idea that you are gone? Josie is faring better than me, I think. She has stopped walking through the rooms sniffing at everything that you might have touched. Though she reacts to hearing the cat flap and jumps up to see if you are coming through. She realises she are not there when there is no loud cry to alert us to one of your 'presents'. How often have I said 'good boy Alfie' when you brought something in (still alive - you're so gentle) and then spent hours trying to chase it round the house. We usually succeeded and I was able to put them outside still in one piece.

People say they feel their pet around them. I wish I did all I feel is slightly sick still and off my food. I received one of the packages of homeopathic remedies today which has been held up in customs. So much for fast transit. I ordered it on 26 November. It was so costly but as Leslie said, he was worth it. We could give anything to have you back.

Does keeping the diary help? Difficult to say. Some days I am so heartsick I can't even face talking about you. I do it because such a special soul as you deserves to be acknowledged and remembered, even though it breaks my heart to do so. I hate being sentimental - but I hope there is a place where you and all my lovelies can be together. Love and thanks for all the joy you have given everyone who knew you. xxx